


The Friendship Fics (previously: Not too shabby)

by varenoea2



Category: Gorillaz
Genre: Bromance, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-20
Updated: 2015-07-10
Packaged: 2018-04-05 08:27:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4172874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/varenoea2/pseuds/varenoea2
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>EDIT: I'll simply make this a multi-chapter thing and throw all my friendship ficlets into this. All the chapters are unrelated to one another, but there will be friendship interactions. Some fluffy, some not-so-fluffy. All of them funny.</p><p>The latest addition: "Bloody Mary".</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Not too shabby

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own the characters or the location where the story takes place. All of these belong to Jamie Hewlett and Damon Albarn. This is a piece of fan fiction, written solely for fun, and no financial profit is being made.

NOTES: There’s a canon scene where Gorillaz are in Japan, go to a karaoke bar, and Russel tries his luck with Bronski Beat’s “Small town boy” (… how I wish they had made a clip of that…) and Murdoc gets himself beaten up by provoking some big guy (ROTO, page 91). Anyway.

 

Aaaand here goes the last pint. Hopefully the last pint. Whatever comes up next must be part of Murdoc’s internal organs. He dimly remembers that sea cucumbers can extrude all their organs in dangerous situations. He wonders if he's turning into a sea cucumber.

But that really _was_ the last pint, and there is peace in his stomach at last. Seems like his kidneys and liver aren’t coming out to play. Just as well. Murdoc lies down and folds up neatly around the toilet bowl. He should get up – he’s been in here for 20 minutes – but he can’t bring himself to it. He’s exhausted, his knees are shaky, his nose is clotted with blood, and his brain hurts.

Not his head. His brain. The back part of it. _Inside_ the dome. He knows this feeling only too well.

Just a little rest. His cheek is lying in a dry stain that was probably piss before. But he doesn’t care. Just five more minutes… before one of those nosy buggers comes looking for him…

The door to the restroom opens, and heavy steps bumble around behind him. Oh no. Russel. There’s going to be a lecture.

And here it comes. “You oughta be ashamed of yourself!” booms Russel. “We’ve been here for an hour, and you’re too shit-faced to stand up!”

“I’m not shit-faced.”

“Yeah right”, snorts Russel.

Murdoc turns around slightly. Russel towers over him. The light from above gives him a halo.

“I’m so sober it hurts”, he informs Russel. “How’m I supposed to be shit-faced when all my drinks are in there?” He raps his knuckles against the bowl above his head. There’s a faint bell-like sound.

Russel folds his arms and gets ironic. “Care to explain why you’re lying flat on the floor, then?”

“Concussion.”

Russel still blames the booze. “Concussion, eh? How do you know that?”

“I’ve had a few in my time, lardass.” Looking into the light gets tedious. Murdoc curls up again.

Russel pauses and cowers down beside him. “You’re serious?”

“Yeah.”

“Shit. Come on, I’ll help you up.”

“Nah, I’m good. I’m still a tad queasy. Who knows what’ll come up next.” Murdoc waves vaguely.

Russel gnaws his lip. “I’ll get your jacket, at least. So that you have a pillow.”

“Nonono. I’m just glad it’s out of the firing line. Go back in. I’ll be back with you in a bit.”

“I’m not leaving you alone like this, man!”

Murdoc looks around to Russel again. “That’s… decent of you”, he mumbles, “but I’m good. I’m lying on the floor, eh? It’s not like I can fall over.”

“I’ll tell the others that you’re safe from falling over”, Russel says. “Be right back.”

While Russel is away, Murdoc curses his fate. His first time in Japan, and he’s going to waste tomorrow sleeping. He remembers his first concussion, when he was seven and his dad threw a churn at him lovingly. He slept the whole next day. In school, and at home. Truth be told, you could catch more sleep in school than at home…

Russel is back. He sits next to Murdoc and pats his shoulder. “Okay. I told 2D to tell Noodle to call us a taxi.”

“What?!”

“What, what?”

“We’re not going home, are we? It’s only eleven!”

Russel gets ironic again. “Why, what’s your plan? Set the dancefloor on fire? Bit of flamenco?”

“You’re an arse, you are.”

“There’s a beautiful john in the hotel. You won’t miss this one a bit.”

Murdoc hasn’t got the energy to fight. To be honest, he had no idea _what_ to do with the rest of the evening. It’s not like he _can_ do anything. He just doesn’t want to go home.

“You’re bunking with me tonight”, adds Russel. “I’m swapping with 2D. Just in case.”

Murdoc is feeling cantankerous. Just because he’s lying on the floor, they can’t shuffle him around like a carpet! “You’re one big, fussy mother hen”, he snaps.

“If you think I’m fussing, wait until Noodle sees you.”

“Yeah. Fucking embarrassing.”

Russel tilts his head. “You’re not used to people worrying about you, huh?”

“Bloody silly.”

“Get used to it. You have friends now.” Russel gives him a pat on the back. “Although I really don’t know what you did to deserve them.”

Murdoc closes his eyes. His stomach has been quiet for a while now. “Wish I could remember what I did to get that bastard mad”, he says. “It must have been good.”

“It was daft, and you’re an ass cookie.”

“MU-DOC!!” Nobody stops Noodle from going into the gents’ room when she wants to.

“Get it off me!!”

_You have friends now…_

You have to sell your soul just to find someone who cares about you in this world, right? But then, the Big Man can’t make people care. He can only buy them. And it occurs to Murdoc that these friends are maybe the only meaningful thing he ever made all by himself, although he doesn’t know what to do with it.

Not too shabby for a start.


	2. Bloody Mary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I've seen quite a few "Phase 2 Noodle has her period and suffers terribly, and the boys are trying to be helpful, except Murdoc who can't handle it" fics. Thought I'd give this a different spin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own the characters or the location where the story takes place. All of these belong to Jamie Hewlett and Damon Albarn. This is a piece of fan fiction, written solely for fun, and no financial profit is being made.

Noodle is curled up on her bed, watching cartoons. Everything sucks. Even cartoons aren’t much fun when you’re only watching them because you can’t do anything else.

The door slams open. “Noods, do you… oh.” Murdoc stops dead.

“Why do you never knock?” Noodle asks reproachfully.

“I keep forgetting. I also keep forgetting to say _are you decent_?”, sneers Murdoc. “That time of month again, eh?”

He’s certainly not decent. He never is.

“Yes”, says Noodle.

“I was going to ask you to come to the shops with me, but the answer’s probably no.”

“Sorry. I wish it wasn’t this way.”

“Well, you can always get a hysterectomy when you’re older.”

“Haha. You should suffer pain like this! Then you would know better!”

“You _could_ kick me in the balls, but that wouldn’t be the same.”

“No. Look, 2D brought me a hot-water bottle”, says Noodle and pulls it out under her pullover. “And Russ gave me these.” She shakes a packet of Advil, and it rattles. “But I can't do more.”

“Uhm.” Murdoc chews his lower lip. “You know… through… long years of research… I realized that there’s another thing a girl can try. To relieve the cramps, I mean.”

Noodle hears only one word. “Research?”

“Not on myself, of course. On… willing subjects of the female persuasion. Hehe.”

Noodle has a feeling that this is going to be disgusting in some way or other. “Is it the kind of thing a young girl should know?”

“Oh yes. Every girl should know!”

That kind of wisdom coming from Murdoc? Noodle digs a little deeper. “Would Russel kill you if he knew that you’re telling me this thing?”

“Oh yes.” Murdoc snickers. “You see… the thing is… when you have a foot cramp, you flex your foot, right? And when you have a cramp in your… ladybits, you flex those. So. Ahem. Use your imagination.”

Noodle really doesn’t want to. She doesn’t know where this is going, but it must be very unwholesome.

Murdoc rolls his eyes. “For fuck’s sake, woman. Have a wank!”

“That helps?” asks Noodle incredulously.

“Some birds, yes. And if it doesn’t help, at least you’ve had a good time.” He shrugs. “A better time than watching cartoons, for sure.”

“You found this out through… studies?”

“Private studies. So anyway. Coming can make it better. And seeing how you don’t have anyone to do the job for you – and if you did have someone, you know that Russ would kill him, and that would be his luck, because you don’t want to know what I would do if I got him first – anyway, it’ll have to be a DYI project.”

“You mean you… you did… _studies_ … with girls who were… but… can you even…?”

“Yes. You can. Everything. If you’re not afraid for the sheets. Anyway.” Murdoc is fidgeting. Good. Now the conversation seems to be getting embarrassing even for him. About time! “I’ll be leaving you lovebird alone, then.”

Noodle pelts him with several furry toys before he’s out of the door.

“Asshat”, she mumbles. She pulls her knees up and pouts. “Asshat.”

 

An hour later, Russel has a careful look into her room.

“Aaaw. She’s sleeping like an angel”, he mumbles.

“She is?” Murdoc squints over Russel’s shoulders to get a look. “Patient unclenched, then?”

“Leave her alone”, mumbles Russel. “The last thing she needs is your insensitive remarks. Or worse, your suggestive remarks.”

“Yeah. I’m not a good influence on a growing young lady”, says Murdoc, and walks away whistling.


End file.
